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Post by Danielle ..DJ s mom on Nov 16, 2016 18:57:09 GMT
It's been 7 months.....
I was watching Ellen yesterday, love her, and a gentleman stated its a choice to be happy.... I think that is a true statement under normal circumstances Of life... But we know sometimes life throws us a big fucking curve ball. My point is I want to be happy again but as I type I'm crying.... I don't know how to be happy like completely happy..a happyness that come from inside... I'm afraid that died with my son.
i miss him more everyday... My heart hurts
blessings
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Post by Danielle ..DJ s mom on Nov 22, 2016 15:43:52 GMT
Good morning 
The holiday season is upon us... For some it's the first without their child....if you have read my posts before you might know I have two young children...my son was 22 when he passed and my oldest daughter is 11 and my youngest is 1.... My children were very far apart in age lol my girls and I did some Christmas shopping and a bit of decorating yesterday... I don't want them growing up with the holidays being something that is sad and everyone crys. ...so we are going to make this a great holiday season....one they can look back on and smile...that's my goal anyhow .... Wish me luck... And a good luck to us all durning this holiday season...
Blessings
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Post by Danielle ..DJ s mom on Dec 23, 2016 22:25:59 GMT
Afternoon,
Im driving back to California tomorrow...
the last time I was in California I buried my son....
Anxiety and fear and sadness are everywhere...I feel like I did 9 months ago...
when end does this end? This unbearable pain in me...when does it stop....
Blessings to all
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Post by Danielle ..DJ s mom on Dec 26, 2016 6:32:20 GMT
Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night💜
Blessings
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Post by Danielle ..DJ s mom on Apr 12, 2017 5:27:22 GMT
Hello everyone 💙
It's been a while since I have been one here, but today is a "special, shifty " day...
It has been exactly one year that I have held, saw or touched my son.... He left my house one year ago today and I never saw him again..
We had a great visit, prolly one of the best we had had in quite a while.... I have never spoken on here of the particulars of his death... It is very hard to speak of...
My son was a paranoid schizophrenic...he was electrocuted on a three tier power line.... Technically he took his own life, tho I still don't think that was his intention..
He said when he climbed the power lines he could not hear the voices, my voice actually.... Telling him horrible things.... My son had just been released from a mental facility one week prior..... The assholes told me "ohh he's better, he'll take his meds , bla bla bla.... I begged them to help.... No.... They did not listen to me, his ma...
I'm so sorry every day I could not help him... I hope and pray he's happy and healthy now....
The 16th..it will be one year that he passed... I can't say I'm better... You are never " better" ... But I try and remember the good times... The happy healthy DJ that I knew before....
RIP my sweet sunshine.. I'll love you forever I'll like you for always, as long as I'm living my baby you'll be
💙
Blessing to you all
Danielle
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Post by Danielle ..DJ s mom on Apr 17, 2018 1:56:53 GMT
Hello all Another year has passed..I did not think anything would be as diffuclt as the first year without my son...but yes year two is even harder... People lie when they say it gets "easier" ...they have never lost a child...it most certainly does not get easier... It gets harder.... I try and function everyday like a "normal" person but it's not really me... I'm lost and scared and sad ..it's days like today that I actually allow my self to feel Lost and scared and unbearably sad.... I don't want to do another year without my sunshine ... I miss his voice, his face , his smell and most of all his hugs... He was adorable and funny and a smart ass . I miss him every second of every day !!! I am on a path to try and help in the mental Heath field, if I can prevent one parent from living my nightmare I will find some sense of peace.. Blessing to you all Danielle DJs mom ❤️ |
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mamaz
New Member
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Post by mamaz on Aug 31, 2018 4:45:34 GMT
Hello all... A shitty place for us all to be, but here we are..
my name is Danielle, I lost my oldest child, DJ, on 4-16-16... Life does not get easier, sorry.... It just goes on.... I miss my son so much just typing that makes my heart break... But I need others to talk to... I cuss a lot and I'm fucking mad as hell...but again I feel a need to chat with other parents.... My story is a horrible tragic story, as is yours I'm sure... If you would like to chat I check this web page daily...
Danielle, DJ s mom 
Danielle I would love to talk. I cuss more now then ever  we can exchange info if it's easier. I live in Hawaii so not sure of our time difference. Lmk mama. We all need each other right now |
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Post by Danielle ..DJ s mom on Sept 17, 2018 12:35:33 GMT
Anytime My email is SMITHFAM2182001@hotmail.com I'm so sorry for your loss.. My sons 25th birthday was yesterday.. I miss him more and more every day 💙 |
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Post by R guerrero on Feb 18, 2019 12:03:40 GMT
My son was kill. He left a baby girl. He was a proud father.
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Post by vbintn on Mar 14, 2019 22:01:25 GMT
Just finally found this thread and saw your post.
Don’t worry I cuss too...
I recently lost my 26 year old daughter. My only child. Now I just had my 6 month old granddaughter to a pos guy... god long story. I’m hurting so bad. No one understands me.. I’m tired of being the strong one..
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we can exchange info if it's easier. I live in Hawaii so not sure of our time difference. Lmk mama. We all need each other right now